Pyro's Life

Dwelling on the past

The All American Rejects... a sure sign that I have been dwelling back to the beginning of last year's school year. Meaning, my eighth grade year. I have been in an AAR mood and for some reason, I don't immediately switch from one of their songs to another song by an entirely different artist... amazing. A tolerance level, reminder of the past, and new found appreciation for the lyrics have been developed. The only thing these guys sing about is heartache. How it happens, the effects after. They don't wander anywhere else and don't take the same perspective on heartache that I usually do. When I write about heartache, if I am really depressed and have to get it all out usually my result becomes something more... I guess you could say 'goth'. Something darker then the 'emo sob story' stuff they sing. Gall, the only reference to bleeding is in 'Paper Heart'. Yet, somehow after listening to 'American Idiot' (by Green Day) time and time again, I ran into AAR and started listening again. It's so sad and bouncy at the same time, its crazy. Not like the kick-A punk grunge stuff I'm listening too right now. For some reason, I am enjoying AAR now though.

Gall, one year ago, where was I? Lets fast forward to the first week of September. I had my birthday, had just met Kara (who would have thought that meeting her would change everything this last year), Dave and I were going to go to the Evanescence concert where slutty women offered to flash us in exchange for our tickets (we needed money so we said 'no'), school had just started, I met a million new people and established a ton of new friendships... wow.

Oh yeah, Dave had burned me Evanescence, Good Charlotte (my first real introduction to punk, even though they are really a pop-punk band), and oh yeah, All American Rejects (lol). That was the start of real music for me (other then Nickelback, which was my first metal band).


That is a whole lot of major events that occured within a month's time. By the second week of September, everything had changed and would only change even more. By the second week of October, Kara and I were going out. By the first week of November, both Jessie Brauer and Jessie Jackman became good friends of mine (and have only gotten closer). And as soon as new years hit... it was a whole new ballgame...

But we won't launch into New Years. Those who were there knew what happened and everything that occured afterward. And they would agree with me that everything changed. It would take too long to talk about anyways. Infact, I dont wanna brief the rest of the year right now either. So I'll stop at reflecting now.

Point is, in just two weeks a ton had happened. Within a month even more changed, two months, even more. Four months, everything changed. One year...

One year, there isn't hardly anything left that is the same. I still hold onto old friends, have acquired many new ones, restored old ones, and became best friends with someone who I truly treasure. My taste in hobbies has changed, taste in music has been developed, experiences have grown, faith has been tested, everything.

I guess the most important thing though, is I now know how hard and worth it it is to truly love someone. I know what it is like to truly love someone and all the challenges and emotional rollercoasters to go on. Every day over the past year there has not been a single day when I haven't thought about it. About her. It has been the hardest thing I have ever done, and definately one of the best. No matter how hard it has been and if she will never love me, I'm happy if I can do anything in my power to see her smile. See her truly happy. I hope that in the end, everything will be the way it should be. Whatever the results would be. Lets hope the next year is going to kick some major-A. I am definately looking forward to it. Best of luck to all of you.

-Shane

posted by Pyro128 @ 11:37 PM